Greek culture—at least erotically—hasn’t changed much since ancient times. When you’re ready to get it on in Greece, get inspired by the kink art at the Cycladic Museum. You shouldn’t have too much trouble finding modern Greeks to play along—an annual international survey shows they have the most sex on a weekly basis and are as adventurous in bed as a trip to Mount Olympus. Even so, we’ve got some tips to help you get busy with the bedroom’s best.
Greece is a sexually liberated society where inhibition crumbled way before the Acropolis, so there’s no beating around the bush—unless you’ve got bad aim. It doesn’t matter who you’re chasing; there’s relentless but playful competition for dominance on this sexual battlefield. Don't let those persistent Greeks intimidate you; never back down. If someone makes fun of your backpack, tell them you’ve traveled the world with it. Then throw them back a—“where’ve you been with that knock-off Gucci, huh?” Remember that this power play is all in good fun, but that it weeds out the unworthy. Let’s face it—everyone wants to hook up with someone out of their league. What you lack in local Greekness, you will make up for with wit, charm and confidence. No Greek can resist sincerity. Giving up or playing hard to get won’t hack it here.
Sip your frappé, smoke your cigarette and flip your komboloi. This isn’t Crotchkie’s from Office Space, but the more flair, the better. Let your prospects know you’re already having a good time—it helps to visualize how much fun you’ll be under the covers. It doesn’t matter if your body is as hard as Hercules and your swagger is smoother than Rico Suave; attracting attention is only half the battle. Greek people are happy and lively at heart, and this is a pursuit you can lose by going against the grain. That means you damn well better eat and drink whenever the opportunities are presented (quite often), and be sure to shake your ass the hardest on that dance floor for some public foreplay.
You’re going to meet horny hotties no matter where in the country you are. Best bets are bars or public beaches—just be sure to pack plenty of Mythos and a volleyball or paddleball set; games reduce your creep factor. Fancy hotel bars dominate the nightlife scene. Even if you’re not a boner-fied guest, your new prospect could be the key into suite 69 if you play your cards right at the swank bar. Check out Galaxy at the Hilton where the sunset view is arguably all the sex you'll need, the backpacker-macker hotspot Hoxton, where you can hook up with your own backpacker breed, or Mike’s ,if karaoke is your idea of foreplay. If you absolutely must get laid but are seriously striking out, give your dominant hand a break and head to Paradise Beach on Mykonos Island. Even Jabba the Hutt manages to score there.
Ancient Greece was notorious for its same-sex relationships. Men in the military got it on to boost morale and the whole nation was cool with older men having a boy partner in what they called Pederasty—which we're glad is over with. Lesbians and their title may have originated from the island of Lesbos, and the men were swinging both ways harder than an ambidextrous big-league ballplayer. Interestingly enough, today’s Greece is surprisingly close-minded when it comes to homosexuality. There are plenty of same-sex spots in the city of Athens, but they’re rarely advertised so you may find yourself using the back doors. The village of Gazi is where you’ll find gay-friendly spots like Blue Train and Lamda headlining the action. If you’re looking to rest your head under a roof with similar-minded sexuals, book at the Rio Hotel and down the complimentary ouzo they give you when you check in. Islands are more gay-friendly, with Mykonos being the #1 spot simply because the drinks keep flowing and the sex is so rampant that nobody knows what poked them. Santorini has recently let itself out of the closet by exploring any and every type of sex, and lesbians continue to flock to Lesbos especially during the Women’s Festival of Eressos.
Greece has legalized prostitution. If it gets to that point, you can have all your desires fulfilled for about €60. Head to the hotels and bars around Omonia square in downtown Athens. Strip clubs are also hooker hot-spots, but try to avoid going in because many are clip joints. Ladies, we’re almost sorry to say that male prostitution is illegal, but why buy the distillery when you can get the Ouzo for free?
With all of Greece’s beauty, lack of inhibition and cultural love of food, it’s no wonder the country is one of the horniest in the world. If travel alone doesn’t rev your engine high enough, then a beach view on a full stomach better do the trick. Now that you know how to act, go be a local’s lucky lay.