Super Bright Flashlight
This flashlight can turn you into a hero or the ultimate douchebag, depending on how you use it. Waterproof, skid-proof, and abrasion resistant, this LED flashlight is more powerful (1600lm) and lasts longer than your run-of-the-mill incandescent light. To use it for good, whip it out in the wilderness and lead people to safety (or the nearest pissing hole). To use it for evil, turn it on at 4 am when you come back to the hostel from clubbing and absolutely need to find something at the bottom of your backpack. Shit’s really bright; be nice.
This thing is packin’ heat! The ultibrush saves you the trouble of remembering to bring the small odds and ends of oral hygiene and/or embarrassment of being caught using a stranger’s toothbrush. One sleek brush, this thing has floss, toothpaste and a mirror packed into its body. The cap can be used as a rinse cup and the bristles won’t make your gums bleed. Currently on kickstarter, let’s get this thing made!
keruac key ring
Show people that you’re beatnick cool by strapping a likeness of the quintessential travel book to your keys. Keruac’s “On the Road” inspired an entire generation to quit their jobs and look for meaning through travel (and drugs). If you’re going to sport this thing, make sure you’ve read the book or can fake it convincingly.
Sleeping Bag with Arms and Legs
This is basically a onesie made out of sleeping bag material. There are rip cords and zippers everywhere to allow for temperature control, ventilation (this one’s important) and easy entry/exit. Theoretically, you can just lay down anywhere and call it your bed, then wake up and be ready to go, in your sleeping bag, to your next destination without the worry of rolling up the bag and carrying it around. We can’t guarantee you wouldn’t look like a total idiot (see pictures) but you’ll be damn cozy.
Texting, calling, skyping, and google-hanging, are fast and efficient ways to connect with your loved ones. But c’mon, training a bird to fly halfway across the world to send your dad a fart joke is straight baller. This process will take you several years so make sure your visa is up to date. This is what both you and your dad will have to do:
- Find a pigeon. Just not the ginger one, he’s special.
- Get a comfortable crate, put your pigeon in and leave it there to acclimate for at least 2 hours.
- Take the crate out about a mile away from the hostel and release the pigeon. Make sure your dad is on schedule as well.
- Quickly scurry back and wait for its return.
- Repeat this process, gradually increasing the distance you travel, for at least a year.
- Exchange your pigeons! You’ll have to fly home for this one.
- Fly back to the hostel with your dad’s pigeon, attach your fart joke (pick a good one) to the bird’s leg and release.