OTP’s Guide to Partying Your Ass Off in Zagreb
Photo by: Pliketi Plok
Perhaps the centuries of invasion and Roman, Venetian, Italian, and Austro-Hungarian rule drove the Croatians to drink early on. Regardless, the Croats have maintained a raging party spirit. A mix of coastal islands and land-locked city centers, Croatia is a bipolar, geographic wonderland. Get into it like a Croat on a muthafuckin’ boat with OTP’s Guide to Partying Your Ass off in Zagreb.
Photo by: Clive1945
PRE-GAME
If you’re gearing up for a blurry-eyed night on the town, down some carbs to help soak up the sauce first. Just off the main square, Nokturno (Skalinska 4) lures the Young and the Moneyless with wafting smells of cheap Italian food like lasagna, pizza and pasta. During the summer months, prepare to wait for a seat on the outdoor terrace with hoards of people gathered for a stomach-lining, but not budget-breaking, meal. If you prefer sweating booze, then head straight for Tkalciceva Street in Old Town, where you’ll find the highest concentration of bars and cafés. Before the night gets messy, grab a mellow drink in Ban Jelacic Square, or a rowdy one at Bar Plan B on Tkalciceva. During the winter, Bar Plan B becomes your Plan A –they have a heated patio.
Photo by: juicowski
Zagreb’s mix of bars, beer halls, disco discos, pubs, and clubs are strewn about the city like panties on a sorority bathroom floor. Most are concentrated in either Upper Town near Tkalciceva, or Lower Town at Bogoviceva and Trg Preradovica. Whether wetting your whistle in one spot, or blazing a liquid trail about town, beers will generally set you back about 12-16 kunas ($2.50-$3.50). In Lower Town, try Bulldog Café; the hugely popular bar sits on a pedestrian street (Bogoviceva)–perfect for beer-goggled people watching. If you’re dying to bust out some of your sick moves, head over to Saloon, Zagreb’s oldest discoteque. For a taste of fake fancy, Posh Fantasy Bar will take your breath, not your money, away. It’s close quarters inside–so cop a feel and blame it on overcrowding. Does your fantasy involve lords, rings, and people from middle-earth? If so, hobble over to Tolkien’s House, which is decorated like scenes from the author’s famous trilogy. The chance of witnessing a nerd-on-nerd bar brawl is high. However, getting any ass in this place might be a distant fantasy. Choose your party spots wisely.
Photo by: johan Chomet
Drunkfood
Squeeze some grease in the window of munching opportunity between party and post-party. Pingvin (penguin in English) is a sandwich bar at Teslina 7 in Lower Town serving all kinds of sandwiches, burgers and salads. It’s open all night and day, so pull up a chair at one of the tables, or eat on the way to the next spot–a sandwich will set you back about 22 kunas ($4.25). Most of the time, unless you’re a cracked-out hobo looking for his own kind, lurking around train stations in the middle of the night is a bad idea, but the bakery goods at 24 hour Pekarnica Dora (Strossmayerov trg 7) are worth the risk.
The After Party
It’s 2 am, but your party is far from over. Many bars and clubs stay open all night, including those further out by Jarun Lake where the scene gets rowdy. Clear your sightseeing calendar the day following a night of drinking at Žabac–drinks are cheap and the crowd is ready to go all night. Walk a few steps from Žabac to Aquarius, a club with rooms that open onto the lake and a playlist that ranges from reggae to hardcore.
Photo by: knicci
If you’re not ready to take off your dancing shoes just yet (or if you’re too drunk to know how) stumble over to the City Centre Hostel on Tkalciceva. There’s no curfew, free internet and an outdoor terrace from where you can watch the sun come up. Rooms go for about $20 per person and it’s conveniently located above a bar.
The Hangover
After a night of partying like a Croatian on vacation, your head will feel like you’re working in a coal mine with an amplifier. It’s time to find burek, a pastry pie made with phyllo dough and fatty fillings. Croats believe the dough soaks up booze and the oils from the meats and cheeses inside will help line your stomach to ease the absorption of alcohol.
A night out in Zagreb may need to be countered with a few days of recovery sleep. Rehydrate and clean the sand out of your vagina, because there’s more Croatia to explore! If getting on a train is not an option in your current state, hit the hairy dog repeat and see if the outcome is any different the second time around.
I’m Kyle, a 2002 graduate of UC Santa Barbara with a degree in English and Art History. My studies also include time at Cambridge University, but short of picking up phrases like “cheers” and an affinity for “a good curry,” the experience was more social than academic. In addition to fashionable beers and cuisines from far-flung places, I started embracing things like currency conversions and the metric system. In other words, it was when the travel bug nestled in for the long-haul.
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Woo I’m tired just thinking about this party night.